insatiable hunger
as i promised myself last night, i curled up on my futon to watch Adam's Rib. i plowed through the necessary book and though i didn't quite roll around and get dirty in Cixous, i did dip my toes in. at the opening of her essay, Cixous exclaims:
"I write this as a woman, toward women. When I say "woman," I'm speaking of woman in her inevitable struggle against conventional man; and of a universal woman subject who must bring women to their senses and to their meaning in history."
i'd like to open this blog post with my own exclamation:
i write this as a hungry woman, toward hungry women. when i say "hungry woman," i am speaking of woman in her inevitable struggle against societal expectations of what a woman's appetite should be; and of a universal hungry woman subject who must bring hungry women to their senses and to their meaning in a history of appetite.
i've seen Adam's Rib more times that i'd like to admit in a public forum. for the first time last night, i noticed how katharine hepburn's character is frequently eating. in fact food, and the act of consuming it, are almost a running gag through the entire film. one of my favourite scenes in the film is the evening at the end of the first day when the bonners are hosting a dinner party (btw, if any of you were wondering where my screen name came from, now you know). in the scurry of getting ready after arriving home late from work both amanda and adam are running around in various states of undress. amanda runs downstairs to greet adam's mother and father, her evening gown still gaping open at the back. more guests arrive and one of them asks for a drink, vocally choosing amanda to get it for him. she rushes into the room, only aware that her name has been called, but unsure of what the person wants. what i love about this moment is not only that she is refreshingly harried, but also that her mouth is full of cracker and she is visibly enjoying it. later in the film, after the trial is over and things look gloomy for the fate of her relationship with adam, amanda, dining at a flirtatious neighbour's apartment unwittingly pops a cracker into her mouth just at the moment the neighbour asks to kiss her. lost as she is earlier in the maze of her own reflections, she doesn't respond, but merely licks the crumbs from her fingers and continues her soliloquy about her and adam's philosophy of marriage ("equality, mutual everything"). in my experience of the genre of the 1930s/40s screwball comedy, this natural display of eating and appetite is unusual. thinking back over claudette colbert in It Happened One Night, veronica lake in Sullivan's Travels and even a younger kate in Bringing Up Baby, very rarely to screwball heroines eat, and if they do it is always a moment of heightened comedy (think colbert and the raw carrot or lake and the ham and eggs). movie goddesses with their mouths ringed with crumbs licking their fingers while debating philosophies of relationships is not a common sight.
as i type this entry, i myself am licking from my fingers the crumbs of a delicious blueberry muffin i bought this morning at the grocery store. as of late, what with at least 2 hours on the water each morning and a continuous gain in muscle mass over the past two months i am constantly hungry --- and i'm not talking a sort of vague craving for something chocolatey, though i still experience those cravings from time to time! --- but full on, tummy-rumbling, mouth-watering hunger. i eat a sizeable breakfast and no sooner do i settle down to work, then i am hungry again. this goes on till i go to bed at night. i've noticed however in expressing this hunger, i've created many socially awkward moments. people don't seem to know what to do when faced with a genuinely hungry girl, a girl who isn't too worried about calories (but is worried about the nutritional content of what she puts in her body), who isn't afraid to relish her food. most manage the moment with wry humour, a few have subtly indicated that my proclamation that i'm so hungry i could eat my own arm is somehow only confirmation of my gradually receeding femininity (or perhaps it's just shock at my apparent willingness to descend into cannibalism!). female appetite, at least in my experience is surprisingly still out of place.
realizing that amanda is an eater, and remembering what i've read in biographies of katharine hepburn regarding her voracious appetite, comforts me a little when i think of my own hunger and new-found willingness to feed it. many women that i know struggle with having a healthy relationship with food. it is also one of my own struggles. every person manages her/his relationship with food differently, so in no way am i trying to make a statement about how others should go about it, but this recent (re)discovery of the joy of satisfying my hunger makes me hope that someday hungry women everywhere will have the courage to satisfy their hunger with what ever it is they desire.
"I write this as a woman, toward women. When I say "woman," I'm speaking of woman in her inevitable struggle against conventional man; and of a universal woman subject who must bring women to their senses and to their meaning in history."
i'd like to open this blog post with my own exclamation:
i write this as a hungry woman, toward hungry women. when i say "hungry woman," i am speaking of woman in her inevitable struggle against societal expectations of what a woman's appetite should be; and of a universal hungry woman subject who must bring hungry women to their senses and to their meaning in a history of appetite.
i've seen Adam's Rib more times that i'd like to admit in a public forum. for the first time last night, i noticed how katharine hepburn's character is frequently eating. in fact food, and the act of consuming it, are almost a running gag through the entire film. one of my favourite scenes in the film is the evening at the end of the first day when the bonners are hosting a dinner party (btw, if any of you were wondering where my screen name came from, now you know). in the scurry of getting ready after arriving home late from work both amanda and adam are running around in various states of undress. amanda runs downstairs to greet adam's mother and father, her evening gown still gaping open at the back. more guests arrive and one of them asks for a drink, vocally choosing amanda to get it for him. she rushes into the room, only aware that her name has been called, but unsure of what the person wants. what i love about this moment is not only that she is refreshingly harried, but also that her mouth is full of cracker and she is visibly enjoying it. later in the film, after the trial is over and things look gloomy for the fate of her relationship with adam, amanda, dining at a flirtatious neighbour's apartment unwittingly pops a cracker into her mouth just at the moment the neighbour asks to kiss her. lost as she is earlier in the maze of her own reflections, she doesn't respond, but merely licks the crumbs from her fingers and continues her soliloquy about her and adam's philosophy of marriage ("equality, mutual everything"). in my experience of the genre of the 1930s/40s screwball comedy, this natural display of eating and appetite is unusual. thinking back over claudette colbert in It Happened One Night, veronica lake in Sullivan's Travels and even a younger kate in Bringing Up Baby, very rarely to screwball heroines eat, and if they do it is always a moment of heightened comedy (think colbert and the raw carrot or lake and the ham and eggs). movie goddesses with their mouths ringed with crumbs licking their fingers while debating philosophies of relationships is not a common sight.
as i type this entry, i myself am licking from my fingers the crumbs of a delicious blueberry muffin i bought this morning at the grocery store. as of late, what with at least 2 hours on the water each morning and a continuous gain in muscle mass over the past two months i am constantly hungry --- and i'm not talking a sort of vague craving for something chocolatey, though i still experience those cravings from time to time! --- but full on, tummy-rumbling, mouth-watering hunger. i eat a sizeable breakfast and no sooner do i settle down to work, then i am hungry again. this goes on till i go to bed at night. i've noticed however in expressing this hunger, i've created many socially awkward moments. people don't seem to know what to do when faced with a genuinely hungry girl, a girl who isn't too worried about calories (but is worried about the nutritional content of what she puts in her body), who isn't afraid to relish her food. most manage the moment with wry humour, a few have subtly indicated that my proclamation that i'm so hungry i could eat my own arm is somehow only confirmation of my gradually receeding femininity (or perhaps it's just shock at my apparent willingness to descend into cannibalism!). female appetite, at least in my experience is surprisingly still out of place.
realizing that amanda is an eater, and remembering what i've read in biographies of katharine hepburn regarding her voracious appetite, comforts me a little when i think of my own hunger and new-found willingness to feed it. many women that i know struggle with having a healthy relationship with food. it is also one of my own struggles. every person manages her/his relationship with food differently, so in no way am i trying to make a statement about how others should go about it, but this recent (re)discovery of the joy of satisfying my hunger makes me hope that someday hungry women everywhere will have the courage to satisfy their hunger with what ever it is they desire.
posted by Amanda Bonner at 10:27 a.m.
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